"dark lipstick makes you look intimidating"
good. stay the hell away from me.
aries: sexually frustrated at everything
taurus: really nice but dead inside
gemini: mostly just hungry
cancer: in the closet but not really
leo: super gay for everyone
virgo: promises not to tell and then tells everyone
libra: lazy assholes like seriously do something with your life
scorpio: i’ve never met one but they’re all jerks
sagittarius: always boning your mom
capricorn: loves everyone but loves themselves more
aquarius: never not killing you
pisces: big booty bitches
remember this show where this one dude had to guess what is he smelling and he put his nose into someones asshole and went “smells like ass” and the commentator went “correct” and this dude did the funniest expression ever. wheres that gif
*drops food on floor*
germs: go get it! quick!
king germ: no.. we must wait 5 seconds.. it is the rule
my favorite thing about this post is that germs have apparently gained enough sentience to develop a form of monarchy
my uncle used to be one of those people who drove dead people to cemeteries and such
then he became a taxi driver and the person he was driving tapped his shoulder to ask a question and my uncle screamed really loud
I’m sure that’s what he thought.
GET OUT ME LOBBY
Potatoes doing yoga
Reanna Chief at Dakota Dunes Casino PowWow.